I knew it was my last day there

I knew it was my last day there.

I had enough of this office.

Damn with the paper work, damn with the boss, damn with the colleagues, damn with the place;

There’s was no sense of right and wrong here.

It was better to leave than stay here.

Cuss words jammed my throat; humiliation still raw;

But my self-worth, my self-worth went rolling downhill.

I felt helpless; cried my heart out.

After two days of rigorous job search, I landed up with yet another decent job.

Rightfully, when one door closes, another opens.

My lost faith restored; my self-worth resurrected.

Love Blooms With Time

Hi Max, 

Here I am sharing with you something which I had already shared with you some time ago. So, I’ve nothing new to disclose; no secrets to share. 

Then why share at all? What purpose is it going to serve?

Yeah! You are right. It won’t serve any purpose in particular. But just by opening my heart here you’ll get to know that whatever little I shared with you was just a part of the whole.

So here go my some unshared feelings…

Yeah! It’s true when you came to see me for the first time, your cuddly-bear-physique had put me off. You didn’t look your best that day.

"A case of pot calling a kettle black?"

Okay! Fine!

But aren’t people attracted to their polar opposites? 

And I admit that I kept looking for ways and means to get rid of your marriage proposal, so much so that I proposed to one of the guys in college. But my dream boy had another dream girl in his life.

Hopes hammered. Desires reached a dead end.

And unfortunately with no bakra(sacrificial lamb) in sight I had no choice but to say yes to your proposal. And suddenly on our day of engagement I was so head over heels over you. Yes, you looked ultra- fabulous that day. In fact, I would term the word fabulous as an understatement. I know, I know I looked ultra-ugly that day with all that over done make-up and all. But what I want to admit here is that I fell for your looks on our day of our engagement.  

Yeah! Initially we were like two ferocious lions sharing the same den. Our egos, misgivings, insecurities, and complexes had taken over our lives completely, so much so that we overlooked each other feelings. In fact,"my way or the highway,” become the unwritten, unspoken rule of our lives. And I admit I made the most of it by going the highway.

Nonetheless, despite the negative omens, despite our misgivings, despite the naysayers, despite we-told-you-so relatives, despite you-should-have-married-my-daughter aunties, despite you-would-get-a-better-match friends, despite our inherited anger and stubbornness, despite my dark-complexion, despite my short stature, our marriage survived. Woohoo!, this month we completed nine years of our married life. Probably God’s sweetest gift to us in the form of Aryan helped us fight through the toughest phases of our lives.

Today, when I look back, everything we did, every argument we had seems so childish and immature. 

Now, I can’t think of a life beyond you. It’s you who make my life complete.

Your Angry Women

P.S. Btw you know, I've mellowed down a lot these days.

  The prompt for this fortnight was to write a letter to :
 Your current love/ spouse/ crush or Your ex-love/ spouse / crush.

Every once in a while

Arithra looked longingly at Ashok.  But Ashok shook his head in disbelief and yelled at her, “Avin that’s it...no second kid.”  

Nothing in the world could rock Ashok’s rock-hard decisions. For Ashok and Arithra, life revolved around their one-year-old son Avin. But Arithra still wished to expand her world: a cute lil daughter to complete her family. 

With private jobs becoming insecure, Ashok failed to understand Arithra’s unreasonable longings. Every once in a while, she spoke about wanting a daughter only to be met with stony stares from Ashok.

Today, Avin turned eight and Arithra suddenly realizes she was carrying…

"Given enough time, nothing is more changeable than rock."

Every Once in a while - A Prompt by Write Tribe.

If only you were here…

If only you were here…

I’d love to cook your favorite chicken biryani’s and prove to be a caring wife.

I’d love to dress up more perfectly and beautifully, only for you.

I’d love to be your fan and umm… ahh… at your cooking experiments.

I’d love to spend my days and nights listening to you; and lessening your heartaches.

I’d love to take you out on a date and do the honors of paying the bill.

And, I’d love swap places: be the breadwinner and not just be the supporting force in your life.

If only you were here...

                                                 *    *   *    *   *

Yes, my hubby dear expects these aforesaid things from me; and I really wish to translate these expectations into reality sooner than later. 
The inspiration for these 100 words stem from the book P.S. I Love You. Started reading it a couple of days back and literally speaking, I'm loving it so far.

Truly Alive!

Prompt: Truly Alive

I was tense. The AC was on, but I was sweating profusely. My parents held my hands in support. They’ve been with me throughout this ordeal. From filing of the FIR, to police scrutiny to public questioning, not for once they showed any sign of helplessness, though they were heartbroken from the inside.

Today was the final verdict. I’ve been waiting for this day desperately…not just to hear the verdict, but to spit on the face of my abuser and hurl my choicest abuses.

“Hang till death” pronounced the judge

Overwhelmed, I let out a cry.

I felt Truly Alive.

In honor of Nirbhaya- Delhi Gang rape victim 

                                            *  *  *  *  *

The MET department had warned off heavy showers. But I dare not defy the bully boss. An important client meeting was scheduled. So, I pulled out my polka-dotted umbrella and summoned a cab. Reluctantly, the cab driver agreed to drop me, but at double the fare. By now the light drizzle turned into heavy showers. The roads looked drowned and deserted. Not a soul to sympathize with.

“Where are you?” barked the boss from the other end of the phone.

“At your grave,” I snapped back, and pushed open the door

The first showers were heavenly. I felt Truly Alive. 

How About Maintaining a "Gratitude Journal?"

Drinking Coffee with Malti Bhojwani!

My 2 cents:

#1 A brilliant, breezy read.
#2 A must-have book for self-help book addicts, quote addicts and super cynics.

# Keep your highlighter ready. It's an inspiration loaded book. In fact, positive thoughts and quotes ooze through the entire book.

Book review: 

If ‘The Secret’ is one of your all-time favorite books then you are sure to enjoy ‘Don’t Think of A Blue Ball’ by Malati Bhojwani. “Plug in” is the word for this book. Plug in with the universe, she says, to manifest your dreams. Plug-in to small pleasures of your life: don’t rush through them; be it bathing, gyming, yoga, etc. Even while getting a hair-cut done, you can be plugged-in. Instead of getting impatient and looking at the watch again and again, plug-in to relish the experience, she says. Now you may ask how do you actually plug-in? You can do it through different ways: through prayers, meditation, centering, and grounding and even by just connecting, shares Bhojwani.

Plug-in with complete trust.

Give up how and the when, trust that what you desire is magnetized towards you.

The Universe is never late, but generally, not early either. Why not early! To test our implicit trust, perhaps. If everything you asked for came to us immediately, you will never grow and develop.

Insightful lines… Yes, the book is peppered with such strong, thoughtful lines.

No doubt the book deals with the much-talked about concept of “Law of attraction.” But let me tell you Bhojwani handles the oft-repeated topic in a refreshing new way. This is one thing that drew me to this book. She says, if you only think of the negative and the bad, then you are definitely attracting all the bad and negatives in your life. For instance, when you start assuming that your spouse is in an extra-marital affair and start nagging about it, he/she may literally start cozying up with a colleague just to prove you right. When all relationships seem fake to you, even true relationships may turn their back toward you. Our negative mindset on different things, attract only negatives in your life. So, the author asks us to have implicit faith in the universe. Believe in the Law Of Attraction and think only positive to attract positives in life. The Voltaire’s quote in the book aptly echoes this philosophy: “Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe”.

The only way to have what you want is to trust that you will have it and to expect it without a doubt.

So you got the premise!

The book revolves around beautiful concepts of Thankfulness, Appreciation, Gratitude, the Power Of Declaration, Universal Abundance and much more.  In fact, the book has inspired me so much that I decided to maintain a Gratitude Journal. Plus, the pithy catch phrases, analogies, anecdotes, quotes by famous authors and of course, the exercises given at the end of each chapter makes it a very interesting read. More than anything, the author’s habit of maintaining a Daily Gratitude Journal is my best take away from the book.

Final take: 4/5. Go for it.

A Perfect Book For Daily Dose Of Positive Thinking

I thank the author for a copy.
[This review is part of Reader Cosmos Book Review Initiative]

Just Two Words Mattered From Him

It’s was extremely hot that night. Daddy and daughter had pulled out the mattress and had spread them in the living room. And within moments they were deep in sleep. Or where they? Ananya couldn’t sleep that night. Sitting at the edge of the sofa, she was contemplating. Should she or shouldn’t was not the question here? She had made up her mind. Her marriage was in shambles. She didn’t want to go back to my parents once again. She knew her hubby wasn’t asleep. So, she waited and waited…she knew her next move…she had seen it in crime patrol that toilet cleaner kills. And Gangster movie had reconfirmed her idea. Then out of the blue an afterthought strikes…Her parent’s house was the best place for it. Better do it there than here.

It was Sunday the next morning, in-laws had gone to Church. She didn’t go. Hubby was working from home, daughter was sleeping. Without saying a word, she started her Activa . She knew what she had to. Just a few blocks away and she started playing the whole picture in her mind’s eye. How will her parents react? Hubby and in-laws will be held responsible? She was okay with that? But then what about her girl? That too didn’t matter too her. There would be so many to look after her, she thought.

But within moments, she was back at her in-laws home. Saw hubby lying on the floor with BP shooting up. She poured water on his face and he was back to normal. “What happened?” She asked? "No nothing", he murmured. It was at that moment, she realized that along with her, he too was under tremendous pressure. “Why didn’t you stop me from going,” she asked. He gave her a painful smile and said,” I knew you would come back.” If she hadn’t?

Just two words: “Ananya don’t go was all that I wanted to hear from him. But it never came,” shares Ananya. “There’s was always this Big Ego Breathing Down Our Necks. Ego was taking our marriage down. And there were big adjustments problems. But after that aborted attempt, I never attempted doing that again,” reminisces Ananya. Today, she is happily married with a decade of happy experiences to boast of. When I ask her today, what made her return to her in-laws place on that fateful day, she just gives me a blank stare. Probably, suicide was not written for her.

Ego is exclusively responsible for breakdowns of many relationships, including marriages…some of which unfortunately end in suicide. Even in this 21st century some men, including Ananya’s husband, believe that adjustment should come from the women’s end and they won’t give in an inch. However, this doesn’t happen. Both parties should be equally involved to make a marriage work like other relationships. Every relationship is a two way street…except one.





 

7 Bloggers Who Were The Wind Beneath My Wings!

A super short post: yes, I had reserved it for the final day.

For various reasons, one being sounding sycophant, I was wary of writing this post. But after reading, “Don’t Think of the Blue Ball” by Malati Bhojwani (as part of readerscosmos review), I knew in my hearts of hearts that what I am doing was right. Yes, the book pumped me up so much!

The premise of the book is quite promising. It talks about gratitude, thankfulness and appreciation for people around you. In fact, the author suggests readers to maintain a Daily Gratitude Journal, wherein they should thank all the people who helped them during the day. (Sadly though, am yet to come up with such a journal.) 

So much for the greatness of the book. Honestly, I always wished to thank many bloggers promptly and profoundly for visiting my small space for these last seven days (well, almost), by replying to their priceless comments, but I admit, I've miserably failed to do so. Time constraints…hope you understand. So, here I am thanking all my senior bloggers who helped me sail through this festival with flying colors. I would have gone only so far without their comments (precisely, I would have come up with just 4 posts, no more). A special thanks to Corinne for organizing the festival and suggesting fellow bloggers to comment on at least three posts in front of their links… that set me sailing…ended up commenting regularly on 10 to 12 blogs. Peanuts! I know, considering that some senior bloggers spread their fragrance across all blogs commenting and inspiring...thus pushing the envelope in terms of commenting.

There are many like me who are the ‘Children of the Lesser God’ in terms of language limitations, but a kind word uttered by a fellow blogger makes the whole world go round. Believe me!

So here’s goes the list of bloggers who I want to give a big shout-out for being with me for all these days. Thanks for being the wind beneath beneath my wings.

#1. Richa
#2. Roshini

#3. Suresh

#4. Vishal

#5. Little Princess

#6. Me

#7. Bhagshree

Tussi great ho, tofa kabul karo

Others bloggers that I can bring to mind include: Smitha, Shilpa, Sugandha, Usha Menon, Jyothi Nair Mahabore, Diana, Susan Deborah, Karan Shah, Talya Tate Boerner,Shail,Kathy, Anu and of course, Corinne. Thank You All.    

Since starting this challenge, I've more than quadrupled the number of people who look at this blog. Agreed, that's still not an good number, but I did love all the attention that my blog was getting.  

Write Tribe Team...I doff my hat to you. 

7 Abusive People That World Can Do Without!

As a kid if you had inquired from your Gran, what does a predator actually mean, she’ll have this to tell you “a predator is an animal that kills other species for prey; not his own”. But as the world progresses, you know your Granny’s explanation doesn’t ring all that true anymore. Today the word predator means more than just wild animals. So, if your kid questions you today, “mamma, what is a predator?” Definitely, you’d be in two minds before answering him/her. A WILD ANIMAL OR A WILD PERSON? Which is more truer in the current context?

In today’s context, predators come in the form of abusive parents, abusive children, abusive caretakers, abusive husbands, abusive in-laws, rapists, et al. In fact, anyone can don the garb of a predator anytime. Yes, today predators don’t live in jungles, they live amongst us only. SO BEWARE!!!

Predator No. 1 – Parents – When parents lose control over their temper and start hitting their kids mindlessly. The other day I read a story of this father who hit his 8-year-old daughter with a rolling pin so hard that she died. Yes, the incidents of child abuse are increasing day by day. Now, have I abused my kid today?

Predator No. 2 – Children – Parents tend to their children with all the love and care in the world. But these days children fail to reciprocate the good things that their now helpless parents had done for them when they were young. No wonder, there’s rise in number of old age homes in our country. Now, have I called up my parents today?

Predator No. 3 – Governess – If you are planning to hire a caretaker for your kid from an agency: beware. My bro had a bad experience. It so happened when my bro and sis-in-law left for the office, the governess had good 8 hours in hand to check all their cupboards and belongings. Yes, the camera was left on in their house, so as to keep a check on the caretaker. And who knows whether she’s was feeding herself on kids’ food while the kid went hungry? Now, did I check up on my caretaker today?

Predator No. 4- Rapist − Even before dust could settle down on Nirbhaya’s case, TV channels are now busying showing a rapist who managed to jump 30ft-high-prison walls of Bangalore Central Prison using bamboo polls and sticks. He’s already raped 11 women it seems. Now, he's freely lurking on the streets. Did I get for myself a pepper spray?

Predator No. 5 - Housemaids – Now and then you can hear stories of housemaids and drivers ganging up against their owners. They are not what they portray themselves to be! Check out their credentials before you hire them. Now, how many times I myself have failed doing that?

Predator No.6 - Colleagues – Office politics may be a bad thing, but more often than not, I’ve seen colleagues indulge in this insensitive behavior without the slightest twinge of conscience. No matter if all hell breaks loose on you, but for them it’s all about making the right noises @ the right places and do all that they can to pull the rug off your feet . Now, do I indulge in office politics, and find faults in my colleague for no reasons at all?

Predator No.7 – Abusive in-laws and husband – The other day an acquaintance informed me that her brother threw his wife out of the house. The couple had just entered in their seventh month of marriage. But, the incident didn’t surprise me considering the rise in divorce rates. Btw her mistake: she bitched about her in-laws on the new Samsung 3G mobile gifted to her by her hubby darling. And how did the husband come to about the bitching incident? There you guessed it!!!Yes, he had put some non-sense application on in her mobile that helped him record all her conversations with her family. The latest I heard was, the boy is wanting to divorce his wife. Now who’s at fault here? And who's invaded whose privacy? I keep bitching about everything in this world and that includes my in-laws as well. Aaarrrggghhh…
Now, if my acquaintance reads this? 

Hmm…too much of venting out…So guys, what kind of predators have you encountered so far?

I am taking part in The Write Tribe Festival of Words 1st - 7th September 2013